It usually starts with something small Sometimes I don’t know what it was at all Sometimes I do I add more to it, things that don’t even relate My mind spins as it gets bigger, inflates Like a spiral, it grew I’m so far out that I can’t trace it back to where it began I’m always a burden, no one loves me, I’ll never find love again I use absolutes Always never always never always never I ask questions to which I’ll never find answers But I’m not seeking truth I’m mentally unstable, sick, deranged Why am I like this? Why can’t I change? If only I knew If I told you I needed an ear or a shoulder Would you give me a hug or a hand to hold, or Would you wait for a day or two? What if you didn’t take me seriously Thought I was only acting deliriously And you waited a few. . . too late.
Copyright © 2022 Brandon Ellrich
September 10th is World Suicide Prevention Day. In the United States, you can call or text 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline if you are experiencing mental health related crises or if you are worried about a loved one who may need crisis support. You can also visit https://988lifeline.org/. The previous Lifeline number (1-800-273-8255), still remains in effect as well.
This poem is in response to What Do You See #150 at Keep It Alive. Please visit Sadje’s page as well.
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